As many of you know I recently moved from Texas to Charlotte, North Carolina for a new gig. Last night was the end of my third week here. I’ve been working a lot (to make a good impression), and spend most weekday evenings working out and advancing my own business interests.
Needless to stay I haven’t had a chance to meet very many people outside of the office. That had the potential to change when I heard about BarCamp Charlotte. I decided this would be a great event for me to attend and get to meet some people in the city with similar interests. [Side note: Something came up and I couldn’t attend Saturday’s sessions.]
I’m a relatively confident, social person, but I’m not one to go to a movie by myself or sit in a restaurant by myself very often, though I have done the latter before. The point is I spent most of the week trying to convince one of my co-workers to wonder uptown (about 30 minutes) with me for the Friday night pre-party.
They all politely declined, and by the time I got off work Friday night I had talked myself out of going uptown by myself. I told myself I needed to clean the apartment, catch up on some reading, write a blog post, etc. I convinced myself I would not meet anyone worthwhile, drinks and parking would be expensive, and I would probably get lost.
After dinner I started catching up on my reader, and then decided that chances are I wouldn’t meet anyone, it would be an awkward experience, and I would want to leave by the time I got there.
Then I told myself the alternative. I definitely wasn’t going to meet anyone sitting in my apartment on Friday night. If I met one useful person it would be worthwhile, and if I didn’t, I had only lost my time.
I ended up having a decent time and meeting some really cool people like @mattcheney who knew Jeff Widman, who will be interviewed on this blog on Monday. This only confirms my suspicion that the world is a small place and that the people trying to change it will keep turning up.
The point of this story is to reassure you that most people have doubts, a lot of people get paralyzed by fear, and it is not always easy meeting new people in a big city. One strategy is to talk yourself through those things and in doing so, set low expectations for the goals you are trying to achieve.
Then, put all the negative feelings aside and tell yourself what do you have to lose? Go to the event, write the proposal, hit the publish button. If one good thing happens as a result then it has been worth it, and you are pleasantly surprised because you set low expectations in the first place. As a result, the doubts and the fears start to subside for future endeavors. Good luck going forward.
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